i have this feeling that gma is cooking up something with all that is happening. she desires that violence will escalate in all parts of the country so she can be justified to declare a state of emergency or martial law – and she can stay in power beyond 2010.
everything is logical.
first, attack the nation’s capital (metro manila) source of electricity – meralco. tell you what? when you control this commodity, everything else will come easy. the press will be easy to restrain. just cut the power off. news block-out will be instantly available.
second, conspire with the armed-leftist groups. let them (milf) play the role of aggressor. milf and gma are in business. the moa is nothing but a front. it does not matter who gets killed. there has to be sacrifices in order for their venture to prosper. there is only one goal – GMA wants to be IN POWER beyond 2010.
this is the place where i lived the longest. but, i guess, that is the kind we expect from everyone. people settling down in their places of birth.
in my younger years, i never thought of going somewhere else. but somehow life leads us to many different places. when i set my foot out of this place, i dreaded the thought of coming back. but after years of aimless wandering, here i am again. barging into my brother’s life. uninvited.
i don’t know what awaits me here (many things i am presently unsure of). but this is the only place i can think about starting all over again. there could be more reasons why i came back. closures. or maybe i did not have had enough time bereaving my mother’s loss. or it only proves the saying that there is no place like home.
when i was young, i often hear family friends tell my mother i would be her ticket out of poverty. and during the times when i displayed disobedience and stubbornness, she would castigate me with sarcasm in her words about this neighbors-induced prediction.
when she passed away i felt a portion of me had also died out. i started to deal with the question “what is the purpose of living?” were the neighbors wrong in their conjectures? or was it not just meant to be?
religion taught me about the life hereafter. coupled with answers to the question “why we are here?”.
the coveys’ books are replete of help on finding a life full of meaning. i even made a personal mission statement according to their suggested guides.
three different sources. but it seems i am still losing it. all statements changes into mere words. i am losing grasp of what they all stand for.
the world now revolves in everything instant. i worked in manila for 3 consecutive years. no other place in the country where it could be described as fast-paced. topography changes every 6 months.
and while there i was completely lost in the crowd.
i did not make it big. or in other’s words, i failed.
now, i am starting again.
and my quittance taught me this idea – we don’t search for life’s meaning. we put meaning to our lives.
iamthebestph